Monday, April 9, 2018

Revelations Fall Into My Lap

I bathed in blue, and then sat in a towel on my bed while I watched her fall asleep in my spot, on the right. 

It was getting warm in the house, finally, and my phone kept buzzing for me to answer. After two missed calls, I picked it up.

"Hello," I answered.

He scoffed, "Well, I'm on the damn road already Grace you could have picked up."

"Sorry, I was in the shower," I replied.

That wasn't a lie. I mean, technically it was. I was actually in the bathtub, and I could have definitely answered the call, but I was drowning in thoughts and salt scrub instead. 

"Am I stopping by or what," he asked.

I paused for a minute and thought, "Should I let him stop by? Should I let him come in my home and sit on my couch for a few minutes to forget?"

"Yes," I stated simply.

I pulled on some black tights and an oversized gray t-shirt. Brad had seen me at my best and worst at this point so there was no use in scrambling to put on makeup. I combed through my hair and sprayed it with some perfume that my ex had gotten me for my birthday. And before I walked out, I kissed my little girl on the cheek and whispered, "Loving you," into her ear before making my way to the living room. 

I threw the dirty laundry in the basket, put her milk in the fridge, and I plopped down on the sofa. That's when my phone started buzzing again. And that's when new revelations fell into my lap. 

It's amazing how much I've learned in the past few weeks. And it's amazing how I didn't go looking for any of it. Although my ego is bruised, and my self-confidence has taken a hit, it's nice when someone wants to reinforce that they see what someone else failed to. It's even nicer when it's someone close to that someone else. 

Eventually, there was a small tapping at my door. It was Brad. 

"I'm about to be really cheesy," he said.

I rolled my eyes.

"Let's write a really, really good story tonight," he continued. 

He lowered the light in the dining room and pushed me up against the column by the front door. But I lost it. Instead of melting into his buttery scent and rough hands, I turned my head and started to laugh. And then he started to laugh. But eventually that laughter was pressed up against my neck, and I was able to forget for just a few minutes longer. 

I told him I wasn't feeling well and that we could continue our novella sometime later this week. I really just wanted to get back on the couch, grab my phone, and finish the conversation that had begun before Brad had ever knocked. I was more intrigued and interested about this divulgence. A divulgence from someone that seemed more genuine than the three weeks of previous conversation that I had been having with the someone who loved me.
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