Saturday, April 7, 2018

I'm Not Ballsy Enough

PSA: I need a date to two weddings in May.

Book #2: Leave Your Jordans At The Door (especially if you're a cheater)

I swallowed the embarrassment and took my power back with that post on Facebook. 

I wouldn't describe myself as ...

Vengeful enough

Ruthless enough

Bitter enough

Or even ...

Ballsy enough

to expose the truth of how a very public relationship of mine was extinguished. Instead, I had enough self-worth to not allow someone to get one over on me. I was played. It was humiliating, but if Claire was in my shoes I would teach her to stand up for herself.

I may have ended up being just a name on a list for him or just another notch on his bedpost - although, it seems like it's never his bedpost that he's carving into. But as I told him, "You did this to other women but I'm not the one that's just going to shut up and cry about it at home."

There are so many books on the shelf that come from real-life events. And at this rate, I don't think I could have even made up the events of my last four years and how every page unfolded. We don't question these books while we read it because we don't know the people. We read, relate, and we enjoy. The difference with a lot of my readers though, is that they KNOW the people so their opinion on what I write is skewed.

"She shouldn't say that. She shouldn't tell that," they think.

My question is, "Well, why not?"

We walk into book stores and movie theaters everyday, and we are entertained by stories that others have already been through. Someone went through that, and other people know those people personally, and you aren't questioning it because you don't know them yourself.

The good is there. The bad is there. The funny and the personal is there too. Because that's how stories - plays - movies - and music become so relatable and beautiful.

If I can use heartbreak. Or mourning. Or joy. Passion. Anger. And refocus it on something creative and to further my career, then that's what I have the prerogative to do. If someone didn't want to be written about poorly, he/she shouldn't have done bad things. And they shouldn't have ever DM'ed me in the first place knowing that it was a possibility. 
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